Stuck In The Middle Podcast


What is Yours?

We have probably heard of quotes like; “What is yours is yours” or “what is not yours, is not yours”or “what is yours will find you”or “if you have something, let it go. If it comes back, then it is yours. If it doesn’t come back, then it wasn’t yours.” Where is this going? First, to redirect our thoughts, this is not related to relationships! 

What is yours? What is that thing or what are those things that light you up from the inside? What inspires you from within to keep going despite challenges? What awakens you from the inside? What feeds your soul and or the deepest parts of your being? What gives you butterflies in your stomach when you see it, hear it and or engage in/with it?

Too many questions, I know! But do reflect on them and possibly write down what comes to mind when you ask yourself those questions?


What then is ‘what is yours’ related to? It is related to your purpose.That which lights/wakes you up from inside, inspire and awakens you from within, feeds your soul and the deepest part of your being. Two books come to mind; The Purpose Driven Life by Rick Warren which I read in 2013 and The Path Made Clearby Oprah Winfrey which I read last month. Reading the Path Made Clear brought deeper understanding to an experience I had back in May of this year.

I had seen a flyer for a Mother's Day brunch organized by Mamipikin Talksand something from within urged me to attend but something from without wondered; what’s in it for me, a ‘non-mamipikin.I battled with the within feeling and without thoughts for a couple of days and finally registered. Flash back to last year, I don’t remember feeling the urge from withinto attend it so I didn’t. 

After registering, which was about two weeks in advance, I was surprised that I picked out my outfit and shoes almost right away. Each day I walked by my closet and saw my outfit, I thought I was going to change it or just not go to the event. Why? Because I thought I might be the only one in the room who isn’t a ‘mother’ yet by definition. Secondly, my entire outfit will be totally out of my comfort zone. I laughed at myself as the day approached and I surprisingly didn’t change my outfit nor change my mind about going.

Is someone wondering why I have outfits/shoe types (sandals with heels) in my closet that are out of my comfort zone but are comfortable? You are not alone! I do wonder about that too :) ;). Most happen to be gifts from friends who say things like; “I’ve never seen you xyz or you would look good in xyz.” Some I bought during a random trip to the mall for something else, with the thought that I may one day want to step out of my comfort zone and it sort of looks comfortable. So having something readily available will make the challenge easier rather than going shopping when an event presents itself because retail therapy isn’t really therapy for me. So here I am, vulnerable and out of my comfort zone, yet finding strength in this moment.


Prior to this moment captured above, the moments shared with the women at the Mother’s day brunch; some of whom I know and others meeting for the first time, the conversation, the experience and the energy can’t be put into words. Like the saying goes, a picture is worth a thousand words…  In a nutshell, something awakened from within and was radiating out. So I snatched a moment to pose just for the sake of it.

 So how does this connect to What is Yours or What is Your Purpose? In relation to The Purpose Driven Life by Rick Warren and The Path Made Clear by Oprah Winfrey, with my recent experience at the Mother’s Day brunch, here are my thoughts…

What is yours will light you up from within; it will urge/nudge you from within towards environments that will propel you in that direction. I felt nudged from within to attend this event from the day I first saw the flyer. I didn’t understand the nudge/urge prior to attending. Mentioned in the Path Made Clear is something along the tines of; the divine powers are at play to propel you towards your purpose, you just have to find moments of silence and stillness to listen. Also, "It is no mystery that important/significant ideas/decisions reveal themselves while you are in the shower."I did a little dance for that because I totally agree with it from my experiences thus far.

“There is no real doing without first being… whatever your calling is, it is already rooted in you. Those roots can be trampled on or tugged at but can’t be removed. They grow stronger only when tended, nurtured and most importantly shared with others… Your purpose is not static, it is dynamic. It is constantly morphing into what it is intended by the divine powers to be.”

What is yours comes to you in bits and pieces;I understand that stepping out of my comfort zone is where growth happens. Being vulnerable enough to share my why and thought process, not for attention but for someone somewhere to feel encouraged to acknowledge and share whatever challenge they are facing (not necessarily publicly) thereby creating a ripple effect.  We can’t change what we don’t acknowledge. To some it may seem like it, it’s just a dress/shoes/event, but can’t understand the thought process involved in stepping out into something that isn’t ‘typical’ for you. Prior to majoring in psychology in undergrad, I used to wonder why certain people avoided certain things that to me seemed ‘okay’ to do, or ‘easy’ to overcome, or ‘normal’ since other people were doing it. Until I came to understand my why.

 Andrena Sawyer, a previous guest on Sitmpodcast mentioned how what she believes to be currently serving in her purpose was birth from a very hard/depressing time in her life.

In this episode, we sit with Andrea Sawyer, Author & president of P.E.R.K Consulting to discuss Business Management Consultant, Program Development, black women doing business + more. Who is Andrea Sawyer? She is the Founder and CEO of P.E.R.K. Consulting.

“Other people are going to find healing in your wounds. Your greatest life messages and your most effective ministry will come out of your deepest hurts.” ~Rick Warren

In The Path Made Clear; Shonda Rhimes mentioned; writing is her truth during which she comes alive. She can write for hours and hours.... Oh how I connected with that!

Oprah mentioned she used to check out five books each library visit during her early years in high school and now she has a book club... My interest in reading non-school related books began when I was about 13years old, I was a slow reader taking about three months to read a book. Now I find myself reading 2-3 different books at a time; sometimes an actual book and or a kindle version of different book and listening to another via audible during my commute. I recently joined a book club and now I call myself “a book hoarder!” 😄

I’m trying to stay within topic and not divert to share my perspective on the mental freedom/liberation and empowerment in reading. If you’ve read any of my previous blog posts, you can tell there’s at least one book mentioned in each and what I learned from it. 

Also mentioned in The Path Made Clear by Thich Nhat Hanh is the healing power of deep listening. I had to pause for a few seconds to acknowledge the butterflies in my belly. Then I recalled this line from the book The Purpose Driven Life… “Find what excites you and pursue it for therein lies your purpose”. ~ Rick Warren

 What is yours doesn’t have to be grand, elaborate and or be the buzz on social media… It doesn’t necessarily require you to quit your job to pursue it and your purpose could be within your job/career.

So, how does What is Yours connect to your Purpose?

What is yours is yours: Your purpose is your purpose, no one can take that away from you.

What is not yours, is not yours:” If what you are involved in/with right now isn’t your purpose, it will reveal itself.

 “What is yours will find you:”  Your purpose will nudge/urge you from within, you’ll be propelled towards it from within. It might be a whisper so you have to find moments of silence and stillness to listen.

If you have something, let it go. If it comes back, then it is yours. If it doesn’t come back, then it wasn’t yours.If you think/feel that what you are currently involved in isn’t your purpose, let it go. If the urge/nudge comes back, then it just might be your purpose, if it doesn’t come back, then find moments of silence/stillness to listen for what is yours. Keep in mind that your job could be that which will help you fund your purpose.

Do you feel like you have found ‘yours?’ If yes, great! Share your story of how. If no, share your discovery journey. If you feel it is in a morphing stage, share the dynamics...

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