Stuck In The Middle Podcast

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JUST DO WHAT MAKES YOU HAPPY

I’m pretty sure we’re no strangers to this very famous line or piece of advice; “just do what makes you happy because, at the end of the day, everything will turn out just fine”. But does it really turn out fine at the end of the day? How often have we made a decision at a particular point in time because it made us happy and then lived to regret that choice? 

I remember a time when I was feeling particularly upset and stressed about something and it seemed to me that the only thing that would brighten my day as if I bought something new for myself so I went out and got myself a new phone. Nothing expensive, just one of those small Techno phones that I could use with a second SIM card I didn’t even own yet. At the time I felt good…happy even. But as soon as I got home, I realized it was useless and unfortunately for me, I was in Cameroon and couldn’t return the phone. You know how it is back there; no returns, especially if you didn’t get a receipt. So I had to live with the consequences of my seemingly “happy” decision which had made me 30.000 Francs (approx. $60) poorer with a phone that couldn’t do what I needed it to do.

And that’s the thing about making decisions at the moment, being spontaneous and just doing what makes us happy. We get to live with their consequences. Sometimes they’re not that bad; it could be something as little as eating soaked garri and milk at 10 PM on a Sunday night because it seems like a great idea and then waking up on Monday morning feeling bloated and constipated. That’s nothing right? I mean its only constipation; it will pass. But then we’ve made worse decisions like sleeping with a guy we just met because it felt good at that time, or cheating on a partner because the act at that particular moment made us feel really good. I could go on and on with more examples but I am hoping that by now you would’ve gotten the drift and are starting to see my point. 

A few weeks ago I came across a video on Instagram where a lady was giving out some advice and kept saying “in this life, just do what makes you happy” and I remember how irksome it felt and I just kept shaking my head. 

Do you know what makes me happy? Like really excited? Eating a bowl of ice cream with a slice of some vanilla flavored Nothing Bundt Cake, the ones with the buttercream icing on top, watching movies and just chilling. Boy oh boy, how I wish I could do that every day! But we all know what that would do to you and to your body, especially for someone like me who comes from a line of women known for having very wide hips and ample derrieres (LOL). 

Even though it would make me really happy to just lie in bed all day and relax and chill, at some point in time, we have to get real. Life consists of making choices and living with the consequences of those choices. The choices we make today lay the foundation for the future we live tomorrow.  As tempting as it may seem to always live in the moment and just do whatever pleases us and makes us happy, it is equally dangerous and misleading, especially when it comes to the more serious things in life. Like choosing a life partner, or picking a job, or choosing what courses we want to take at school. It is always important to ask ourselves how the choices we make today will benefit or contribute to the lives we want to live tomorrow.

A friend once gave me a piece of advice that has stuck with me ever since. He told me that every time I found myself acting a certain way or doing something I knew I shouldn’t be doing, I should ask myself if I wanted to be known as the type of person who does those types of things. If my answer was yes, then I should carry on by all means. But if the answer was no, then it was time to pause and rethink my actions. So for example, if I wanted to be known as the lady who steals, then I could go on stealing if that’s what made me happy, knowing full well what the consequences would be. But then again, such advice only works for someone whose conscience is still alive and whose “sense” has not been sold to “baba”. ;-) 

But honestly though, think about it this way: would you rather go through the pain of discipline and self-control for a little while in order to have a future that is worthwhile or would you throw away your future and just live in the moment and do what makes you happy now, regardless of the consequences? For me, I would rather do what makes me a better person than focus on what makes me happy now because sometimes happiness is too shaky a foundation to build one’s life upon. More so, I believe whatever makes me a better person will eventually make me happy. So there you go; PRIORITIES!

I hope this was a good read for you. Let me know what you think in the comment section below. And as always, this was merely an expression of my opinion. Please feel free to share a contrary opinion if you would like to.

Composed By: Tina Sama